Choir Assistance – The Last Dinner Party and Self Esteem

      In a single day, we were introduced to “Second Best” by The Last Dinner Party and a television performance of “Everybody Scream” from Florence and the Machine in which Florence Welch was backed by Deep Throat Choir. We were reminded of how much we enjoy the elegance of choirs incorporated into songs.
 
     Choir-backed songs in Rock date back to at least the 1960s. The Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” provides a strong example. The following year, Melanie released “Lay Down (Candles in the Rain).” More than 50 later, we featured “HUNTER (the cacophony)” by Paris Paloma (two weeks ago), a song featuring 250 fans providing the backing vocals.

     "Second Best" by The Last Dinner Party

     With the taste for choir-backed songs refreshed, we revisited the album “A Complicated Woman” by Self Esteem. For years, Rebecca Lucy Taylor was half of the duo Slow Club, but she now releases music under the name Self Esteem. Her album is populated with tracks benefitting from strong backing vocals. The concern is that many of the songs are sub-populated by F-bombs, references to problems with mutual oral sex, and other content not meant for the easily offended. Consider that the warning.

    “In Plain Sight” has three distinct segments. In the first, Self Esteem sets the table for the remainder. Then, Moonchild Sanelly presents a spoken-word description of the issue. The final segment is characterized by a crescendos of vocal elegance and vocal intensity. “What the fuck you want from me” has never been stated more tastefully.

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Website: https://www.selfesteem.love/

Lyrics of “In Plain Sight”
Call me anything you want
Call me anything you like
Time's not on my side
Twist it in me like a knife
Round the corners I divide
I will still survive
 
Let it go now
Just let it go
Let it go now
Let it go
 
We got teflon everywhere
They're kinda sorry, yeah, I care
'Bout what's happening next
If you take a moment, take a bow
While coughing blood, who's laughing now?
What's left to protect?
 
Let it go now
Just let it go
Let it go now
Please let it go
 
There's too much noise
From those that never knew me
Opinions from those I've touched
Who claim they know me
All alone in a crowd adorned yet nervous
Scared to speak, I shrink to keep the peace
Hoping I don't shake my purpose
Internally feeling like I'm broken pieces
My past, my presence, somehow connecting
Mirror mirror on wall, am I still the chosen one?
What will be of me if I speak my mind?
Can I still exist?
I know when I'm all alone
I sit in fear I've never known
The world saying who I am, but
I thought I knew myself all these years
Success creating the cell of the oppressed
My existence breaking barriers
And the rest are free
I'm never free to rest 'cause the free imprison me with their ideas
Expectations, opinions and guilt me into sticking to my effect on them
When I'm an entire well of knowledge
 
What the fuck you want from me?
I'm saving you, you're killing me
Won't you let me be?
I've always been free
[Repeating]
 
Let it go now
Just let it go
Let it go now
Just let it go
 
We are equals
But my default
Is to be neutral
I'll let it go
We are equals
But my default
Is to be neutral
Let it go

     “I Do and I Don’t Care” leads with the choir contributions, rather than requiring patience. Again, there is a spoken-word segment, but this one is more personally revealing and thought-provoking. 

Lyrics of “I Do and I Don’t Care”
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and the joke's on you
'Cos you do
You do, don't you?
[Repeat]
 
"Be very careful what you wish for"
She said, looking at me all smug
Like she was the first person to say that
I'm not complaining
"I'm not complaining," I say
I'm whingeing in a new way
And as yet another person with a doctorate in 'Internet' diagnoses me with ADHD
I'm done, I don't care
But I do
I'm still fifteen years old surely?
The passing of time is only measured by the child you talk of
While I talk about mine, my childhood
The only child I know
I watch the biased cut movie on repeat in my head
It's still me, but in an old way
One day
One day you will see your reflection in the pub window
And you're smoking even though you've never been a smoker
And you'll think, "Fuck me
Is this really all there is?"
This really is all there is
And that's the thing you've got to get comfy with
We're not chasing happiness anymore, girls
We're chasing nothing
The great big still
The deep blue okay
And we're okay today
 
If I'm so empowered
Why am I such a coward?
If I'm so strong
Why am I broken?
If I'm so empowered
Why am I such a coward?
If I'm so strong
Why am I broken?
[Repeating]
 
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and I don't care
I do and I don't care, I do and the joke's on you
'Cos you do
You do, don't you?

     “If Not Now, It’s Soon” holds a childlike quality. Of the tracks on “A Complicated Woman” this one is most suited for a Disney production, but it will never happen.

Lyrics of "If Not Now, It's Soon"
Everything you are, everything you see
Everyone got used to who you pretend to be
What if you're not scared, what if you're just here?
Another page is turned now, won't you stand on to see clearly now?
 
Only not too far, it all comes around
You wonder who it was who made the choices in that town
'Cause that was just still you, you're the sum of all these parts
And we can work together to become who's in your heart, I know
 
If not now, it's soon
And whatever is right for you
Will guide you through
Take it back to the beginning
If we still get on that feeling
Take it back to the beginning
If we still get on that feeling
 
Something will happen, because it's got to
It's not just perseverance we need, it's patience
 
And with all of life's complexities
How can one way become what we deem and believe
To be right to be true
Hold on
 
'Cause if not now, it's soon
And whatever is right for you
Will guide you through
Take it back to the beginning
If we still get on that feeling
When you just wanted to sing
You didn't know what that would bring
 
'Cause if not now, it's soon
Whatever is right for you
Will guide you through

      “The Deep Blue Okay” is instrumentally reminiscent of Florence and the Machine. The lyrics even mention “the machine.” The song has two features we love – the choir backing and a composition that approximates being a song-long crescendo (but there is an off-kilter slower conclusion).

Lyrics of Play "The Deep Blue Okay"
And another thing left that I need to say
I took a knife in case it was a home game
It was wrong and right
Did you expect I might be
On the way to enlighten yet another boy?
I had a clean girl brow
It was a little forced to be what I want
Whilst pleasing everyone
 
And you can sing!
And you can thrive!
And you could never say I didn't try
But it was for who I was and not who I'd become
So what's left? I hear you cry
It's just another new mountain to climb
But I know that at the top is where the next hill starts
 
And there is nowhere left for your head to turn
Yeah, there's nowhere left for your head to turn
History repeating
But without the learning
And yet they spend their energy
Coming for anybody
Who doesn't get it right
Who really gets it right?
And I'm a ghost
It's a machine
And now they're following where I've been
But what you looking for?
I'm just like you but boring
 
And in the end
I'm coming clean
I've spent my whole life lying
About the things I want
About the things I should have done
 
I'm inferior, you're the absolute
This has got everything and nothing to do with you
I've a house to buy
I've still got this fucked mind
And as another year turns around the bend
As I nudge out yet another friend
It's still hard out here
But, fuck, I'll just keep going
 
And I'm alone
At least for now
'Cos I can never dumb myself down
I just know way too much
To ever fall in love
But the idea's good
I see where you're all coming from
 
So I'll roll on unmerrily
On the way to make another wedding about me
I've got boundaries plenty
But they're just so tiring
So I pick and choose what is fine to lose
I don't care about much but I care about you
You're the only one who I'm still writing songs for
And I'm on edge
I make it work
I know that digging in the dirt
Is how someone like me gets there eventually
 
And, yeah, there's shame that I'm not okay
But the Deep Blue's there inside of me
And I have my doubts
But know I'll always work it out
 
You'll always work it out
 
And another thing left that I need to say
Y'know what? I might try today
I might fucking try today
Try today
Try today
Another thing left that I need to say
Y'know what? I might try today
I might fucking try today
Try today
Try today
 
It's all mine to lose
She says, "Babe, you got this"
But what does that mean?
I guess I've got something
It's all mine to lose
She says, "Babe, you got this"
But what does that mean?
I guess I've got something